Sunday, November 30, 2014

In A Span Of Two Years

In a span of two years, my wife Meghan and I have had two children. Our oldest, originally baby owl and now big girl, is just over two years old. Our youngest, originally baby moby and now little guy, is almost six months old. I'm not sure at what point time jumped to warp speed, but every day seems to be a little treasure that comes in the form of pictures, videos, or memories. At some point, it would be nice to say we have a time capsule and will bury it to open it up again in the future, but the very thought of doing something that would take so much time makes me feel a little sad to pull away from the moments I might be missing with my wife and little ones. Granted, it would be easier to dig in the summer when the ground isn't so hard, but that's not the point.

I guess I love the moments I have with my family so much, especially the fewer ones with my kids because of their sleep schedule and when I get home from work some days, I often think of the days that have already passed; last week, last month, a year ago. It's sometimes how I make up for lost time when I look at photos on my computer. I often think about how much my daughter has changed over the span of two years, how much my son has changed in the span of six months, or how similar they are or aren't at similar points.

I don't post pictures of them, unless it's on my private social media pages. Maybe I will someday, but I guess I feel a need to keep them protected even if it's unnecessary. Heck, I didn't post pictures of myself until recently. Maybe it was the thought of anonymity that made me feel safer or it's somewhat of my nature to be more closed off until I get to know people.

Fortunately, I feel I've made some pretty cool connections online. I love to talk about my kids, and my love of food and movies, but it's so fun to share how they are doing. Even saying it now, I probably still don't do it enough. I know I don't brag enough about my wife either. She works full-time as a teacher, picks up the kids and takes care of them until I get home to help, and finds time to take care of our meals, clean up the living room, and whatever else she somehow finds time to do.

I have found as I go further along in my life as a husband, father, and writer, I like to (when I find time) to post online about my family, respond to other people's comments of their families, movie watching, or dining experiences, or just try to post simple comments that my wife or I find funny. Maybe I'm the only one that really thinks they're funny...hmm.

In a span of two years, I have loved my wife more than I thought was possible and I have loved two children more than I thought was possible. I knew that I loved my wife far before we got married, but the love she has for our children and they love they show back make it so easy to be grateful she said yes. My children; how wonderful they've made my, our lives. I expected a gaping hole to be filled when I married Meghan, but never did I realize there were other empty spots that have been completely overflowed with love; love for them and seeing the love they have for us.

In my "social" life, I wonder what my kids' lives will be like in the future. Will they be open to others? Will they be apprehensive or guarded, but still be able to be completely free of any self-conscious thoughts? I hope so. It's something I try to do, so I can be a positive example for them. I want to interact with friends online. I want to tell people how excited I am about my family, or even progress on my next book, or how much I respect other writers, or even how exciting it is for some people to follow me on several different social media outlets; I can't help it, but it's really exciting for me that James Rollins follows me. He is such a good writer and it feels great, especially since I'm a writer. Check out his books, it's good stuff!

In a span of two years, I have realized how important my wife and kids are to me, but also how much succeeding as a writer is as well. I want to show them that living your dream is possible and sometimes it takes time to completely fulfill that dream. I am on the path to writing full-time, but I know the path will provide the example I want to show them one day. If anything, I want them to know that I will not expect anything less or reject any ideas that they consider their dreams. I want them to reach up, grab stars as if they only had to use a ladder, and ride them at light speed so their futures burn brightly.

I can only hope my tales of being and evolving my status as a writer will encourage them once they're old enough to want to strum a guitar, learn to surf, study anthropology, or wherever else their paths lead them, perhaps even using a particle collider.

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