I'm sitting at lunch today wondering about so many different things and all of these things revolve around my family in some way. In this sense of "my family," I'm talking about my wife and our soon-to-be-baby. I think about all of the things I want to provide for our child. I want to have a plentiful supply of books, clothes, food, and eventually a good education. When I think about these things, I can't help but think about the career I would like to have to provide these things and what it isn't at the moment.
Currently, I work in a temporary position. I feel very thankful for this position and happy that I can provide some income for my family, but the sense of security I would like to have does not exist. I'm also a writer and even though I've published something, I don't have the experience to back the notion that my books will be a success. I do believe that success can happen overnight, but I also know that success can take years and years of persistence and hard work. I would like overnight, but can tolerate the possibility that my writing career will take time. And what will qualify my work as a success? Many people might qualify success to signing with a publisher or selling a million copies or being recognized in another city by strangers or even the fact of just publishing a book.
Success for me will be when I can undeniably state to myself that I can provide for my family. The day when my wife can stay at home and not work if she chooses. The day when we can provide things for our child(ren) and not question the need to check our checkbook. The day when I can get up and not worry about these things almost every single second of almost every single day. That's the way my brain works. It's either always thinking or completely shut off. It's one of the reasons I enjoy good books, movies and certain TV shows so much, because it allows me to get so involved in the story that I forget (even if for a short while) the worry that my mind conjures.
So what to do...
I ask for help. It's one of those things I didn't like to do when growing up. Well, what's the point in that now. The only pride that I care about is knowing that my wife is and will continue to be happy and proud of the man she married. In keeping to that sentiment, I will ask for help and exhaust all options to make sure that I am successful and able to provide for my family.
I ask, Who can help me market my book?
I ask, Who can help me market me?
I ask, What are the best methods for a self-publisher to get noticed?
I ask of those that have read my book, Will you write a review for my first book?
I ask of those that haven't read my book, Would you like to read my first book to review it (and hopefully enjoy it)?
I ask, What questions should I be asking? How should I proceed with all of the little things that I have no experience in with regards to getting a book successfully noticed?
So I ask these questions as a husband, a soon-to-be-father, and a person that would love to find success that would ease any mindful questions and worry that I have and turn them into answers. Answers that I could share with my wife. Answers that I could share with our child(ren). Answers that I know would mean I'd no longer have to question anything again.
I'm answering as anonymous simply because I'm not technologically savvy enough and I already have too many online accounts to answer any other way, but... Travis, the fact that you are asking some of these questions means you are already "a success." In the eyes of your child, it won't matter if you are a successful writer, a good financial provider, or even someone who can make enough so his wife doesn't have to work. What will matter to that child is the love and attention you give it. That love is not something that fame or fortune can provide; that love is the most precious gift you can give. Ironically, it is also the gift you could accidentally deny by obsessing too much over these other material things. You have a wonderful wife who is loving and beautiful (both inside and out); you are a man who is committed to his family; you have the support of a wonderful family and a large diverse circle of friends; and you are easily one of the most upstanding and genuinely GOOD men on the planet. You will be an excellent father and whether you plan it or not, your child will learn from your excellent example about what it means to be a good, caring, genuine human being. That, my friend, is just about as "successful" as one can be in life.ReplyDelete